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Wednesday, March 18, 2009
WARNING: RANT AHEAD - excuse the language please.I miss him. Why, bloody hell, why?! I feel so darn messed up. I swear I'm fine, countless times, but somehow, yesterday made me NOT fine - don't know how that happened, so please, don't ask. Seriously. I still love him. After so long. So darn freaking long. Why must emotions be so messed up? Because it's definitely not helping me think rationally. My parents were right - I have definitely not been okay. Because I kept in contact with him. There were second thoughts, yes, but I know better. Or so I like to think. But it hurts. It still does. Like I said, emotions = messed up. All because I still love him. All because of that. I feel retarded. Maybe I am. Who knows? Whatever, it doesn't matter anymore. Because I won't see him again. Because I won't message or call him again. Because I'm (going to try) erasing him from my memories, my life...my hopes and dreams for him to be 'The One' for me. I know there are others out there, but he...is? Was? I don't know... the only one I've ever felt so strongly for. So it hurts. It hurts badly. But I will survive. I know I can. I'm not the only person who feels or have felt like this, after all. I should've done this earlier. Then maybe it wouldn't hurt so much now; when I'm making it real. But hey, at least I'm doing something. Better late than never. END RANT. Bleh, that was depressing. >.< but I had to do it. Otherwise, I won't ever be able to let go. ...I still feel like crying. I guess that's normal, hey? Or maybe it's just me. Who knows? I definitely don't. Labels: rant powered by blogger, yo. |
Just a little something that I did on a whim. Might not even update that often. Randomness ahead, so beware. Bohahahahah *shot* [archives] [links] anna_sagara's blog ame ame's blog andrew/skywolf's blog deanna/nana's blog fiametta-ink's blog ice-creamy's blog kamal/reno's blog liany's blog lizzie's blog lynn's blog ming han's blog noxy's blog ruz's blog suzanne/sugargal's blog my dad's blog |